Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Year-End Ramblings

There are only a few days left in 2011. Time seems to go so much faster as I get older. How is it possible that my children have grown taller than I am, yet I can recall the feel of cradling them in my arms as if it were just yesterday they were that tiny?

About this time, each year, I try to complete a mental inventory of lessons learned and memories made during the previous 12 months. A few years ago this was a mostly painful process as I was undergoing a sort of transformation. This year, however, there is less sting to it.

On December 31st  last year I posted: “…if you were to ask me to name one day this year (2010) that stands out among the rest I wouldn’t hesitate to tell you it was August 30th. On that day a door that had long been closed opened wide and shined a light on a corner of my soul that had long been darkened. That day marked the beginning of an incredible journey that has amazed me every step of the way…a journey that (as far as I can tell) will continue for many years to come.”  [wow…that quote makes me realize I need to edit a bit more before publishing – sheesh!]

My Knight in Shining Armor (KiSA) continues to illuminate my soul and enrich my everyday life. We have our moments of angst and venom, but for the most part the “honeymoon” continues. As a couple, we have met some goals that we set and modified others. This past year has been a pleasant journey in that regard.

Unaccustomed to having a “partner” in life I have been forced to reconfigure how my brain responds to certain situations. This is not a bad thing. Learned responses are not always “proper” responses. As a result of these changes I can honestly say that this past year of learning who I am in relation to my KiSA has been quite wonderful.

2011 has also brought separation from the oldest child that I “made” (as the chronologically oldest child is mine by virtue of the fact that I raised her – I did not “make” her). Her choice to move out on her own rocked my world in ways I could never have imagined. She made some inappropriate choices and has had to live with and learn from them – while I watch.  Hardest. Thing. Ever.

Yet another of my offspring closed the book on high school…opening a fresh chapter in his life. His goals are set and his path lies before him. I am so proud of how he has matured in the past year.

My baby…is still my baby. He may tower over me and his voice may resemble that of a grown man but that does not change the facts. It’s fun to watch him discover who he is – while under the watchful and protective eye of his mom!

Our fur-babies are getting older – both of them suffer from arthritis and other old-lady-dog ailments – but they are still here!  Always brightening our days with their waggy tails and licky tongues.
The promise of 2012 is beginning to glow on the horizon! What magical things will the New Year hold for us? I can’t wait to find out together!

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